Have you ever sat next to somebody on a train who is completely oblivious to how loudly they are speaking on their phone? Or met somebody at a party who speaks to you for 30 minutes without asking you a single question? I am sure we can all draw on our own experiences where people lack awareness of their impact. Lack of self-awareness can be one of the biggest career-limiting derailers for a leader.

My learnings on building self-awareness:

1. 𝗕𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗮 𝗼𝗻𝗲-𝗮𝗻𝗱-𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗮 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗷𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗲𝘆. It offers you knowledge that is an asset when used wisely.

2. 𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗶𝘀 𝗮 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗶𝗽𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲. Blindspots are called 'blind' for a reason.

3. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗴𝗮𝗽 𝗶𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹. There can be a large gap between how we see ourselves vs how others experience us. Perceptions can become reality. Agency sits with you to close the gap via self-reflection and, most importantly, soliciting feedback.

4. 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗱𝘂𝗰𝘁 𝗮𝗻 𝗔𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 (𝗔𝗔𝗥) – an assessment tactic Navy SEALs use post an event to reflect on what went well, what didn't, and what they can improve on for next time.

5. 𝗕𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗿𝗲𝘀 𝘂𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗴𝗼 𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗼𝗿, question our beliefs, to see the world in shades of grey rather than black and white. Adopt a flexible and curious mindset instead of the need to have the “absolute truth” about ourselves and others.

How clear are you about yourself? And how clear are you about the version of you which shows up in the world?

Our own“self-assessments” are often flawed and we can be terrible judges of our own performance and abilities.